One month ago, I was a completely different person than who I am now. My life has been turned upside down and what was once normal, is a luxury. Last night, no, wait, this past morning (6am), I got off work and wandered into the freezing cold outside and drove a block away to my apartment. There, I turned on the heater and submerged myself in the comfort of my bed. I had earned a rest. Since they have finally started taking out my counter tops and cabinets, I have no running water. So, if I needed to use the bathroom, I had to go to my sister's place, which I did.
I didn't even care that I barely completed my math homework, and I don't really care if my teacher extends the deadline. That is how tired I am.
On top of not giving any. . . anythings about math, I returned to work at 2pm. Can you guess where I am now?
and do you know where I will be until 6am?
Then I get to return to my home with no running water and sleep for a few hours. Then I'm back to work again at 2. Luckily, I don't have to work another overnight shift (as far as I know). By the time I get home tomorrow night, I'll be so tired that I may not even get a chance to visit with my godmother now that she and her husband are back from their fabulous vacation.
With every new day and every new shift I work, I feel like I learn something important from the people here. I'm starting to understand a little bit more of who they are and how they feel. I wish more than anything that I can bring some kind of joy into their lives. Something to be excited for, something to do, a new experience to share. I want their days to have more meaning, something outside of the mundane and uneventful limbo they are stuck in.
One of the couples who live together here got me thinking. The wife usually requires quite a bit of assistance, and the husband usually helps as much as he can. I don't know why it never occurred to me, but I guess they are married for a reason. The husband was unusually delirious tonight, and his wife was extremely concerned for his wellbeing. I was really touched by their relationship, and I hope that when we are that old, my editor and I will be that close still.
but at the same time, the thought of being that old and having to live in such a way terrifies me.
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