You were looking at me with that expression.
You saw me make mistakes over and over,
Knowing that you and I were powerless to stop it."
Sometimes I dream the most profound and deeply interesting things. Maybe it was because of the awful night I had even after I was free from work, or maybe my brain just does this to me for fun, but I had what you could call a nightmare. It wasn't the scary, monster chasing after you trying to kill you kind of scary, a more on a deeper, psychological level of scary. I don't want to go into the details of what the dream actually had in it, but lets just say, it would make a great thriller movie.
The part that stuck with me then most was while something awful was happening, someone I loved was just standing in the door way, watching as it all happened. The way he was standing was weird too, Everything was colorful except him, who stood in a light blue and was all grey. He had this almost disappointed look on his face. I get the feeling, though I don't know if it actually is true, that the same thing has happened in several past dreams. A lot of my dreams have reoccurring themes within each other, so it is possible that something like that has 'happened' before, but there is no way to know for sure.
Now, I'm not crazy or anything, thinking that dreams tell the future or that they have some deeper meaning that is meant to explain reality. I've also made the mistake of taking dreams too literally and that has caused me a lot of trouble in the past. I also try to not let my dreams bother me too much, because they really don't have any effect on the real world, since they are only in my head. And yet. . . I always have this strange feeling after I've woken up, like the dream should mean something.
I know a lot of people have a hard time remembering what they actually dream, or some that don't remember them at all. But I usually can recall mostly what happened in a story-board like way. There is a logical progression that my dreams follow, switching from different focuses as the dream progresses. Most of the time, there are real people that I know in the dream, and on a rare occasion I will have a dream that involves fiction characters from different stories. (Though, characters from Naruto show up the most often).
There has only been one recollection to this day (though, I might have had others, but I'm not remembering any) where I have dreamt I was interacting with characters I had created. Two of the most important characters in my story made their appearance in my dreams a few years ago, in this odd, limbo-esque place. To me, that was a profound moment in my life, it meant that those two characters were actually a part of my unconscious brain. I'm sure it sounds pretty stupid, but it was an incredible moment.
Changing topics a bit, the past few days have been delightfully stormy, with today being no exception. Yesterday, I wanted to write something profound about the rain, but as you could tell, by the end of the day I was lucky to still be coherent. There is a song called 'bringing on the rain' by a Vocaloid (a computer program you can make sing) that has a very beautiful sound, but when I heard it again today and actually saw the lyrics (it's in Japanese), I decided that it doesn't quite give the feeling I thought it did.
But then there is this one. One of the gateway animes that most people have seen and deeply enjoy (including my sister), is Cowboy Bepop. This story about bounty hunters in space has a short and simple plot, decent animation, and lovable characters. The thing that sets this series apart from the others of its time was its music. It jumped from a jazzy opening, heavy rock jams, country-esque sounds, and the list goes on. Now, I've never seen it all the way thorough even though I own the series, and this episode in particular I have no idea what is happening, but I know the song. Two main characters are in a fight when one is thrown out a stained glass window. Right then, this music starts playing.
http://youtu.be/XJjnbhSTuqQ (go listen to it, now!)
This song, so gentle and somber, is what people remember the most. I remember hearing it a long time before I realized it was from Cowboy Bepop, so when I found out its origins, I was surprised. I had a music teacher who told me that the whole reason he threw away his harsh criticisms of anime was because of this masterpiece.
But right now, as I hear it, staring out at the rain, I feel calm. A little lonely, but I'm content as this sweet melody floats around the room.
So regardless of whatever thoughts cloud my mind, I can still relax and enjoy this day for myself.
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